Blog politics

In the true spirit of blogging, here is an interview with myself.

Someone recently commented that your new design is ugly and hard to read, how do you feel about it? For those who care to know, here is what I really think on the matter: I would love to have someone trick out the design. It'll happen at some point. I liked the black template for a long time but I got sick of it.

How do you feel about your profile pic and the issue of a profile pic in general? Feel like maybe a profile pic is too distracting from the writing/jokes as I seem to get an inordinate amount of commenters debating my appearance (ie, saying I look like a tranny, saying I'm ugly...okay so not debating it so much as negating it entirely. Sniff sniff. And who can forget "N*ggerkiller" the commenter who suggested: Die Jew Bitch. Not a joke.) I used to have a smaller sort of character pic with me in huge glasses and a suit coat and no one ever talked about me being ugly. I miss them days...

This one:

I may go back to something more like this.

Do you miss the days when you posted pix all the time, as longerterm readers may remember? Yes. I look forward to switching to a different server soon and resuming with a more visual element to the blog.

Here's is what I'm talking about: Division of space in apt (roommate / me) and this: Underage drinking: bar full of teens! and Sister Lucy and Controversial Movie Reviews and The Gift That Got No Love and Bad Dentist and My favorite trick.

Am I ugly? Sometimes. Other times I look hot. There will always be hoards of uglier girls and hoards of prettier ones.

Am I funny? Pretty much. There are a bunch of unexceptional posts on the blog 2b sure, but also some real fucking winners.

Are comments a complete mixed bag? Affirmative.

Do I value the democracy of allowing all comments to stand no matter what? Fuck no. Die Jew bitch got deleted. This isn't a democracy it's a fucking stupid comedy blog. I put time into it so people can read it for free if they find it entertaining. I don't "owe it to you" to let your first thought stand as part of this little online publication. That said, I find a lot of the neg and pos comments have been informative on some level, so thanks for taking your time to read and respond.

More bad advice.

Here's some tricks to try.

1.) Why not crank bootiecall text someone from someone else's phone?

2.) Crank emails are crazy fun, too. Hop onto someone's computer, the email acct is open: go for it.

3.) Also, if someone's logged into IM, a crank IM session can be really rewarding.

Final thought:
Either the term "bootie call" has incredible staying power, or I need to know what the new slang is on that.

Still crazy after all these years...

Welcome back, Jasmine!

Whaaaaaaat's this?

A new post on Punrise, Punset, the internet's slowest-burning pun and/or vague wordplay blog? YES AND YES.

The topic? IM.

Disfruten como una coca cola.

Just Desserts Cafe

Haha.

(Again thanks to Curtis G for the heads up)

Matt, Matt, Matt. UR GLIB!

"Lauer asked Cruise how he could get more people to understand Scientology, the controversial religion practiced by Cruise and other celebrities like John Travolta.

“You just communicate about it," Cruise said. “If I want to know something, I go and find out. Because I don't talk about things that I don't understand.”

I talk about things I do understand, like loving a woman.

(Watch the video too, according to Curtis)

Bobby Tisdale and Chelsea Peretti in: Sweet Angel

WATCH VIDEO

To clarify: this short was originally shot a couple years ago, and then recently re-shot to have better audio and lighting. It's not a SHAC short. I just think it's silly and funny, but apparently it's disturbing. Who knew?

Standard Subject Header: Must I switch?

My standard email subject header on all personal and professional emails is currently "Healthy Semen." It just makes sense for me to do it this way right now. Unfortunately, this results in a high quantity of "no-answers." I can't wait for this neccessary phase to end.

URGENT NEWS UPDATE!

OIL PRICES HIGH! SHARK ATTACK!

VENUE WANTED

Looking for a good venue for an offbeat new monthly show. Please let me know if you have any suggestions. No bars.

CONTACT: perettiblog at gmail

To clarify: maybe you can grant access to a cool theater space or workshop space or storefront or warehouse (etc--let's think outside the box!) or know someone who can. The evening will have a literary and comedic bent and involve some excellent performers. We do not want a huge space. Thanks!

Dying for this right now......

MMMMMMMmmmmMMMMmmmMMMMMMMM

Bill paying jingle!

HAPPY SONG ABOUT PAYING BILL
Look at this bill
isn't it neat?
Reminds me of the food
I just got to eat!


I think you'll find this does wonders for your spirit. And depending on the volume of your singing, the collective spirit of all the diners in the dining establishment.

(Note: if you're searching for a tune for the Bill Paying Jingle, try: "Santa Claus is Coming to Town.")

Here

When someone is wasting your time you go on ahead and use this on 'em:

Hey do you know what your Jewish name is?

Time Sapperstein.

VARIETY SHAC---ON THE ISLE!

This Friday we're at Cinema Classics 8pm.

The SHAC you've grown to know and love: Shonali Bhomik, Heather Lawless, Andrea Rosen and CP! Plus one of our shorts...I think it's gonna be the latest one, TGIF Danceparty.

Cinema Classics (aka Rififfi) is at 334 E. 11th St. (b. 1st and 2nd Ave). It's next to Venieros.

No guests, just a nice tight show. Comedy...music...and a short.

PS Check out our FLYER ARCHIVE--we're like some crazy psychedelic band from the 60s or 70s or whichever would be the appropriate decade. I always say them together bc I never really know which is which.

But then after the flyer archive blows you away you see this picture and it screws everything up. Wait, are they some cool psychedelic band from the 60s/70s....?

Or just a bunch of gaylords?

And who's the gayest lord of all? It's a tie between me and Andrea. She has her hand frozen in her hair like a major vaj and I have a scarf around my neck like it's a towel in a gay steamroom.

How offensive is the word gaylord, 1-10? I am not able to tell you which way the scale goes in terms of high-to-low or low-to-high.

Isolate a line!

"The government said Tuesday that besides knocking down shacks and the kiosks of street vendors, police were intensifying efforts to destroy vegetable gardens the urban poor plant in vacant lots around Harare, saying the plots threatened the environment."

Alright guys, huddle up! Here's the gameplan: we gotta intensify our efforts to destroy vegetable gardens. Everyone got it? 1, 2, 3.....ENVIRONMENT!!!!

Here's a good sarcastic nickname:

MR NIGHTLIFE U.S.A.

Cool Eyebeam event, this Thurs (June 23rd) 7:30PM

My dear Andrea has put together what promises to be an entertaining night: Eavesdrop, with drinks, food, and an interesting panel moderated by my brother...SO WATCH WHAT YOU SAY.

If I were starting a band

I would call it "US Postal Service." I just think that would be a v. cool band name. And I would want to make music called "lap-pop."

UPDATE: Something very similar to this already exists.

ETHIOPIAN LIONS SAVE GIRL FROM MALE KIDNAPPERS

Read it all on this little obscure website I found. It goes by a random 3 letter code.

But enough cheering for the lions and the girl! Enough triumphant high fives around the office...let's isolate a line from the article, my new fav game:

"In Ethiopia, kidnapping has long been part of the marriage custom, a tradition of sorrow and violence whose origins are murky."

Oddly exhilarating spam!

I really enjoyed this spam--found it energizing and charming. I wanted to meet JJ Marsh!

----------------------
From: J J Marsh
Subject: Hey there babe,. This is of course Sexy J
Date: Tue, 21 Jun 2005 11:52:17 -0800

Hey babie,

Its of course me Little J from the web dating service. I've been hearing all about you and I just wanted to say hola. I want you to check out my site and read all about me too. I just cant wait to hear from you again soon hottie.

ttys, Little July
----------------------

I was instantly roped in by the confidence (subject header/opening line of courses), and next by all JJ Marsh's nicknames, like "JJ" and "Sexy J"! And "Little J"! And: "Little July"! I like how playful JJ is with me and especially how much she's heard about me. I like her calling me hottie and babie. It genuinely makes me feel good no matter how spammish I know it to be. Her "voice" is just so positive and internetty (finishes off with a solid ttys) the mood infected me. Good job on this one, spammers.

Talk about Special Canine Unit!!!!!!

Billy Bob on sex

"Sex doesn't have to be with the model, the actress or the 'sexiest person in the world,' it may literally be like fucking the couch."

(Jolie was voted the "Sexiest Woman in the World" by FHM magazine's readers earlier this year.)

From The Metro (Mon June 20, 2005)

Where I want to be right now.....

Swimming upstate.

HAPPY SUMMER EVERYONE!

Too small to putter...

A PHONE CONVERSATION

FRIEND
Hey, what are you up to?

ME
Oh, just puttering around...

FRIEND
(laughter)

ME
Are you laughing because my apartment is too small to putter around in?

FRIEND
Yes, I mean, what are you stepping back and forth from leg to leg?

Song in my head

"You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille
With four hungry children and a crop in the field
I've had some bad times, lived through some sad times
But this time your hurting won't heal
You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille"

ETC

Hey hey ho ho the dangling preposition rule has got to go!

Sick of it.

Something you could do if you're looking for something to get into:

You could call an ex and just tell him/her that by the way, you cheated.

It's like joking about having a bomb at the airport they will definitely take this very seriously and treat it as true NO MATTER WHAT, NO EXCEPTIONS. Just remember! Once you do this, there is no way of ever, ever going back from that point. You will be believed. Isn't it crazy what words and doubt can do? And lying!

Try it.

Text me and let me know how it goes, I'm curious.

NOTE: I HAVEN'T DONE IT AND NEVER WOULD DO IT--THIS IS SOMETHING I PUT TOGETHER FOR YOU ALL TO DO.

Verbose, floral iming.

"I want you to know you really made me laugh out loud just there, and throughout our instant conversation tonight..."

(My friend got me interested in this line of iming when he started spelling out all the usual im abbreviations in our chat, ie: lol, brb, ttyl, etc. Then my other friend said that joke was already played out. Then two others seemed undecided. That means FIVE people weighed in on this. MANDATORY DRAFT!)

Urgent Text Message, PART DEUX

Here on this blog, you may remember we love texting...and particularly............the urgent variety!

Here's an urgent text for you:

Bus hijakd, takn hostge snd hlp

I actually sent this out from the Fung Wah bus on my way out of town this weekend. Got the following response:

Dont panic caled Delta Force, hlps on the way

Texted back:

Hope delta f wks fst, i cud b ded w in the hr :(

THAT'S SOME URGENT TEXTING!

NEW VARIETY SHAC SHORT: TGIF DANCEPARTY

The newest SHAC short is up...

Hahahahaha.

"Schwarzenegger left the stage almost immediately after his speech, speeding across the infield in a golf cart surrounded by sprinting security guards. Across the field, he pulled up toward a waiting SUV and a large steel gate was closed behind him."

(Thanks to co-worker Curtis Gwinn for the heads up on this paragraph in particular.)

Okay, now back to being away from my computer.

"I am away from my computer right now."

Best Advice is Bad Advice

Go SHOPPING!

Smoke some pot!

Put on a short skirt and go to a bar!

Why don't you plagarize?

They should just call soft-flush toilets double flush toilets.

I'm going to a wedding this weekend...

So I've got to buy a wedding dress asap.

TONITE! VARIETY SHAC TUES. THE 14TH, 8PM, GALAPAGOS. GREAT.

I want to inform you that our great show: VARIETY SHAC is coming up and will be fantastico aka great.

This Tuesday's really great guests are:
TODD BARRY
MARCELLUS HALL (fancy font alert on this site!)

And as always the great SHAC hometeam:
SHONALI BHOWMIK
HEATHER LAWLESS
ANDREA ROSEN
&
CHELSEA PERETTI

After there will be music and hangtimes galore.

Our short film this month has to do with: A TGIF DANCEPARTY. It was edited by Alan Oxman!!!!!!!! This guy is a great, great editor.

This VS promises to be a great one. It's also free, which is great.

Galapagos is at 70 N. 6th St. L train to Bedford.

Hey I think this "great" angle worked out great. Seemed to be very funny.

TONITE: 11PM CRASH TEST AT UCB

307 W. 26th St. (26th and 8th)

Host Aziz Ansari

With: Chelsea Peretti, Nick Kroll, Paul Scheer, and Christian Finnegan. I fought the urge to have all the names link to Nick Kroll bc maybe link humor is too subtle and seems like a technical error. But I wanted you to know.

Today's GYM chuckle:

I find myself LOLing all the time at the gym due to some person's behavior or other, or just an innapropriate thought.

Today's chuckle came when I was on the stair climbing machine. I spotted a fellow across the room who looked nothing like Kelsey Grammar yet had longish blondish hair. I thought: "Hey, Frasier!" That's all it took for today.

Is it wishful thinking to try to use that google recipe thing

for alfalfa sprouts and parmesan cheese? Note: and that's all you've got.

All Tomorrows Parties...and Last Nights...and Yesterdays...

I'd like to send a hearty congratulations to NYC for having some great parties this weekend...last night was the best house music warehouse record release 18th st. the smell that warehouse party smell is the best. Something like: a little smoke, people's perfumes and hair, slight alcohol, little musk. Hm. This is sounding gross but I hope someone knows what I'm talking about. Where you walk into a party and you're immediately like ahhhhh....party smell, smell of fun times. The bass. Sweating. My friend who brought me out dislikes house music but I heart it. He was rolling his eyes when the guy onstage was saying: "I can hear your heart beat, I can hear your heart beat, I can hear your heart...beat...." which is funny to mock def. of course, there's no way around that, but I was into it like "Yeah! My heartbeat! Yeah my heart IS beating!" Into it. Love the mix of earnesty and bass. Sexy and happy music--fuck what anyone thinks. I AM VERY DEFENSIVE RIGHT NOW, AND YELLING AT YOU ABOUT WHY I LOVE HOUSE MUSIC AND DANCING. Also Tchaiko's film party was debaucherous and fun with 5 n's.

Summer is out of hand so far. If anyone has an extra hand: contact summer.

Image Conscious

Feel like an image or two is needed here on the blog.

Here's one I took of the Golden Gate bridge.



Here's some ferns in the backyard of my mama's house in CA.



I am procrastinating something I need to do!

Questions for the Guys'n'Gals Walking Around the East Village in Cowboy Hats:

1.) Are you on your way to wrasslin' up a prix fixe brunch?

2.) When you really think about it, do you find you would be more comfortable in LA?

3.) More of a thought: You should make friends with and constantly hang with a rodeo clown in full attire. This could make you suddenly become very interesting. What is your guyses story?

"We Didn't Start the Fire" had 'em going nuts at Crunch gym Astor Place early this evening.

Everyone--on all manner of machine--was singing along. And this was right on the heels of a Salt'n'Pepa hit. God, I need to get an ipod.

Enjoyable email from friend

We'll call her "Bedelia" and her longterm bf "Frankie".

"my latest strategy when i talk to frankie is that the second he starts saying things i don't like to hear i just pray outloud for God to change him. ie

frankie: well, look, it is your choice to take exams and you are choosing stress
bedelia: dear great spirit i pray that this evening you expand frankie's heart and make him more compassionate and understanding and wise
frankie: stop it! and anyway you don't have a god
bedelia: great spirit i pray that you enlarge frankie's understanding of spirituality beyond his narrow catholic vision of what is religion...etc"

Sites I want to make but won't...

Online Couples Therapy Online:
A site where couples who met online can work through their issues, online.

RNB raps:
A site that has every shitty rap catalogued from the 90's when it was compulsory for rnb stars to have rap interludes on a hit song. (Or maybe just singers rapping more generally: remember Madonna's?)

New favorite text to send out

#1 is: Hey do u knw if fleet wk is still gng on?

And #2 is: all the business presets, one after the other, in paragraph form.

Commiseration

A friend with a career in music was trying to comfort me about some annoying feedback I got a bit ago. He told me his first album was sent back to him in the mail in an envelope. The tape was badly crushed (as if underfoot) and included with it in the envelope was A BAGGIE OF CATSHIT. But that's not all: also included was a very good drawing of a hand with the middle-finger up! THAT'S WHAT YOU CALL MOTHERFUCKING COMMISERATION! I mean this anecdote makes me laugh and I think could get me through almost any bad day.

Tuck it away, friends.

RIDE ALONG!

A bit ago, a friend who had just purchased a Brooklyn condo, forwarded me the following email (sent out to all the condo owners). This is the kind of thing that makes my day:

Subject: Quick recap of last night's NYPD Community Council Meeting ...
To: graydencondos@yahoogroups.com (name changed)

A couple of things that Inspector Banks mentioned as critical in developing a relationship with the 79th Precinct is participation in their Ride Along program. Basically, civilians wearing protective armor accompany police officers for a few hours as they respond to emergencies. This is extremely safe - you will not be exposed to any situation with guns or extreme violence but you will be exposed to other members of the community and get an understanding of their world and also develop a personal relationship with the police officers.

RIDE ALONG!

My friend's assessment was tapped out up at the top of his forward:
clearly i am missing something. before we even get to the ridiculous, voyeuristic safari aspect, there is the goodwill accumulated by finding the hostile members of the community and assisting in their harassment. "who me? no i'm not a cop. i'm just a regular member of the community. i live over on 148 grayden street apt 3B"(address changed)

Another friend put it more succinctly:

Before:
"Give me your money." Money is handed over. Situation resolved.

After:
"Give me your... Hold on, didn't I see you riding around in a police car wearing body armor last night? Where's your body armor now tough guy?" followed by a severe beating.

PARTY FRIDAY NIGHT

Tchaiko Omawale is a rising supertalent. She's a filmmaker with several (very different) projects in production/post-prod right now.

This Friday night is a party/screening of her film SITA. There will be djs, live music, superhot gogo dancers, and projections from the film.

Performances start at 9:00pm

MAINSTAGE DANCE:
Burlesque show "Doll Parts" by Maine & Sarah.
Go Go by Kiesha Franklin.
Roella LaMazing.

LIVE MUSIC:
Tamar Kali.
Mrk Drkfthr.

DJS:
James Spooner
Rich Medina
DJ Reborn
ETC

$10 contribution at the door towards Sita.

SHOUT OUT TO ALL MY BUDDIES!

You guys AIM to please! We live in the United States of AIMerica, home of writer AIMy Tan. Thanks for all the wit and shit. Links! Direct image transfers! And stories about what you're eating or just ate or if you're hungry or busy or if your boss is a dick or how your date went. It's been a million memories so far, I can't imagine what the future has in store.

Commenting

Anyone have any idea why some comments seem to be going through blogger (they show up in my email but not on site) and others through haloscan? I need someone to look at the html and help me out on this one. What do I need to delete.

COUNTDOWN COUNTDOWN COUNTING THE DAYS COUNTDOWN

NEED MORE CLIPS LIKE THIS PRONTO Yes: Bobby Brown and Whitney acting craaaaaazyzyzzyzyzzyyyyyy!


(Thanks to Tim for the gif of love!)

Need the tv show to air asap, been waiting on this 4 EVER. So long that I had forgotten about it til I got im'd this clippity clippity clip. Thank you im, thank you internet, thank you mysterious hidden marital and drug problems, thank you television. Sorry. But these two hit-makers have another hit on the way and I want to support it to the utmost.

Eh, I'm at work....

Mmmmm. Cupcakes. I like them moist, light, and cakelike--not dense--and not to much frosting.

Also: try the BBQ wings at Tribeca's Cornerstone Grill.

What do you guys think of Crest Whitening Strips.

Sitting Peretti

Ahhhhh. Sigh. Smile. Sigh. Spin a bit. Smile.

As you may or may not remember, this is the home office chair I've been sitting in for nearly a year now:

"Lean back...lean back...!"

But no more!

FINALLY, FINALLY this weekend, I resolved this troubling issue by.......purchasing a new one.

SPECIAL THANKS MUST GO OUT:
EJIKE MADE ALL THIS POSSIBLE BY CARRYING THE CHAIR FROM THE STORE FOR ME AND UP THE STAIRS. THANKS GO OUT TO EJIKE. YOU HAVE MADE A MAJOR UPGRADE POSSIBLE AND I THANK YE. IT WAS A NUMBER OF STAIRS AND A VERY HOT PART OF THE DAY.

This year of torment is officially over. Chairwise.

STATS IS HIGH

Have you been by to check out the projects and stats of the Contagious Media Showdown?

TEXTING TIP

Text isn't email
When people go off vacationing--find out about the time difference--that way your "smiley face hahaha" text won't rouse them at 5am. This is a tip for me to learn for myself.

URGENT TEXTING

So far, I only mark silly texts "urgent" as a joke. But I'm sure if we put our minds to it, we can think of legit urgent texts.

YR FTHR IS DED

NVR TLD U, BUT NOW I'M RDY: I WS MOLSTD

U R BNKRPT

@ HSPTL, LEG AMPUT

GNG 2 JMP

NTRUDR N HOUZ

Try sending a few of these out and see how they do with your friends and family.

(If they work well, petition your service provider to make urgent presets.)

Adam McKay funny

AM responds to Huff Post commenters.

(In response to his initial post: Who do we go to for honest critical reporting of this administration, or for that matter, any of our leaders?)

But enough about AM, what's up with CP? Having computer freezing up problems...bear with me.

Want to know some secrets about Jews for Jesus?

TOO BAD IF YOU DON'T. HERE ARE SOME. HOPE YOU LIKE BLOGS--IT'S A BLOG. Who is Moishe Rosen, he seems chill.

J-4-J SECRETS 4 EVR!

CRUNCH GYM: some thoughts.

1.

Class titled: "Bikini Bootcamp." Congratulations! This class title has the precise two-word combination to make me never take it.

Other no-shows would be:
"Toga Tapdance"
"Felt-suit Funk"
"Industry Networkout"
"G-string Kickboxing"

2.

Machine named: the Butt Blaster. It's gotten to the point where I'll just head into the gym and spend the full 4 & 1/2 hours on the Butt Blaster alone. Occasionally, people ask what I do at the gym. I exclusively butt blast.

3.

The Reebok bike has a pre-set course called "Mystery" with a big question mark on the button. What happens? When you press it do you sometimes get a shitty workout and sometimes a really good one? Or does some swarthy guy with a five o'clock shadow slink up and put a bullet in your side with a silencer on his gun and then he clips off in leather soled shoes, as if invisible to the sweating fatsos. And his name is Ronny Murdock, Jason Champagne, Gus Tidwell or Santiago Crump (or some other spammer name). And then the boss is like how was her workout? And J. Champagne is like "I guess it didn't workout so good for her." And they're laughing and pounding the table with all the pasta on it.

PS Ani Difranco has a lyric where she says: "I was cramped up, shitting rivers for days..." ANI are you fucking kidding?

Right before a second date

I think it's funny to be on the phone and ask: "Do you mind if I wear sweatpants?"

Even though sweatpants can be really hot, this question is a definite downer.

And it's too soon for that.

Right....?

A random IM sampling re: sweats on second date ellicited:
(guy1: *no response whatsoever*)
(guy2: go for it! fuck it!)
(girl1: whatever makes you feel beautiful and sexy)
(girl2: no way! you know that! there's time for sweatpants later)

To the last one I replied, but I look cute in them which was met with a callous, okay but you look cute in your other pants too, so go put some on.

Why do jeans have to dominate the sexy pants arena (and why are sweatpants so reviled).

One final thought: SWEATPANTS!

Air Shaft Audio Pranks

Is something for the to-do list.

"Hi, I'm pure evil."

Just found this in an old email forward on safety tips for women:

-----------------------
Another Safety Point:

Someone just told me her friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night before last, and she called the police because it was late and she thought it was weird. The police told her "Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door."

The lady then said that it sounded like the baby had crawled near a window, and she was worried that it would crawl to the street and get run over. The policeman said, "We already have a unit on the way, whatever you do, DO NOT open the door."

He told her they think a serial killer has a baby's cry recorded, and uses it to coax women out of their homes thinking that someone dropped off a baby. They had not verified it, but have had several calls by women saying that they hear baby crying outside their doors, when they're home alone at night.

Please pass this on and DO NOT open the door for a crying baby. This e-mail should probably be taken seriously because the Crying Baby theory was mentioned on America's Most Wanted this past Saturday when they profiled the serial killer in Louisiana.
-----------------------

This luring technique is so crazily evil it's almost very funny. I mean, sure you're a murderer/rapist, but do you have to be that kind of murder/rapist? Even most m/rs have their limits.

LADIES!!! IGNORE BABIES! CEASE ALL NURTURING INSTINCTS OR YOU WILL BE KILLED.

REPEAT: IGNORE THE SOUNDS OF BABIES CRYING OR YOU WILL BE EFFECTIVELY RUNNING TO YOUR SLAUGHTER.

UPDATE UPDATE UPSKIRT UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE: The second I published this post I had that sneaking feeling....this is too evil to be true. I was right.

You win this time internet! You'd think I'd know better but..............hold on I think I hear a baby crying, gotta dash!

I'll be Modern Pooch Guest Blogging again for a bit

Please click on my g-ma's dog (below) to check in with my posts there...



Consider this blog on paws.

HAHAHAHAAAHAAA.

No, but seriously check back--I don't want to flea from my responsibilities on this blog, so I'll probably be working double-doody.

I find it charming how people have taken to affectionately calling me Chelsea "Kottke" P and/or "Kottke Peretti" (Chelsea Perkottke, etc)

due to the manner in which my readership now financially supports me through their generous contributions.