Best Brunch

I made the best brunch and I feel like it's time for me to publicly congratulate myself, whilst also sharing the recipe.

(EU U O ME.)

I made perfectly-browned omelettes with broccoli and pepperjack cheese. And homefries, also perfectly-browned. I nailed it bigtime. I feel like I should have a ton more friends for how cool I am. Then also coffee but E hooked that part up (so-so).

THE PERFECT OMELETTE

Saute:
Olive oil.
Garlic salt, black pepper.
Some chopped up broccoli heads.
A splash of water to steam it a bit.
Set aside.

Grate:
Some pepperjack cheese. Be grateful for every little shred. It's gonna add a lot of grate flavor.
Set aside.

Whisk:
2 eggs per person plus "one for the pan" (my mom taught me that).
Add a little milk (An omelette-master ex taught me that. That was the main thing he taught me. Actually, one more thing I'll get to in a sec.)
Set aside.

Melt:
Salted butter in a smallish pan (That was the other stuff my ex taught me. Salted butter makes the omelette taste a zillion times better and a smallish pan makes the flipping much more successful. Also taught me to start trusting my instincts more.)
Pour egg mixture in. Let it solidify a bit, low heat works well. Manuever the pan in some circles so the liquid egg gets distributed.
When it is almost all cooked but slightly runny up top, add cheese to half side.
Add sauteed broccoli TO SAME HALF SIDE, don't be silly.
Flip -->uncovered side<-- over on top of broc/cheese covered side. Trust me, that will just make things easier. Do you always have to see for yourself?

Flip:
The omelette.

The cheese should be melty and the omelette all browned up.

AT THE SAME TIME YOU WERE DOING ALL THIS SHIT (AND EVEN PRIOR!), JESEZ DAMN YOU WERE WORKING HARD FOR THIS BREAKFAST, YOU WERE MAKING:

THE PERFECT POTATOES

Clean and boil:
Some Russet potatoes. How many do you want to eat?

Take them out of the pot before they are soft all the way through but let them get slightly tender/pokable. This is a crucial step if you want to make homefries like Mama's Royal Cafe in Oakland which is what your goal should be.

Dice:
Those potatoes, stupid. How retarded are you?

Slice:
Some scallions aka: green onions, aka: SCALLY SCAL OUTTA DETROIT.

Chop:
Some garlic.

Put:
Olive oil in a pan. Shake some garlic salt in there and pepper. Put some actual live garlic in (all chopt up and let it get slightly brown) Then throw the cubes of potatoes in. You really need to THROW them in as in toss them across the room toward the pan or this won't work. Try 10-20 ft of distance. Stir it all up and around. Add some scallions in there when they're almost done. This could take a while to get to that sweet spot. Feel free to add more olive oil and a shit ton more salt to form that crispy, salty exterior you've been going on and on about ever since you heard about my home fried potato dish which sounded like it really hit it's mark on the crispy and salty front. You aren't wrong! It was justabout perfect.

Slather with Frank's Hot Sauce.

Who am I? A great cook. A fine friend. A lover of literature and song. I love to travel. I like going to movies by myself. Did you know I have blue eyes and like to smile?

Well, like so many lovable bloggers and flickrers and myspacers and personal websiters out there, I feel greatly inspired by myself and my ability to use the internet to show how wonderful I am as a person. I'm remarkable and I hope you like me.

I'm remarkable and I hope you like me.
I'm remarkable and I hope you like me.
I'm remarkable and I hope you like me.
I'm remarkable and I hope you like me.
I'm remarkable and I hope you like me.

Bye!