Strap one on

Are you a whimsical turd? Yes, you are. But get more specific -- what type of whimsical turdy turd turd are you...? Pinpoint it and buy the appropriate watch'full'o'whimsy aka "turd band" to express it.


Would you like no one to respect you as a dentist?


Would you like no one to respect you as a realtor...?


Or, would you prefer if no one respected you as an "office worker"?


Your call entirely, as long as you have at least $35.95 that means absolutely nothing to you. Watcha waitin' for? Wrist whimsy is just a few clicks from your doorstep.

Then you can go "Hey, what time is it?" glance at your wrist and always think:

"2pm--boy am I a huge piece of turd."
Or:
"9am, how did I become this man."
Or:
"3:45 and my brain is still pure shit."
Or:
"12AM!! TIME TO BUY A NEW WATCH!!!!"