What? There are more teams than the Red Sox and Yankees?

I have just received word that there are actually more teams in Major League Baseball than the Boston Red Sox and New York Yankees. In fact, as a resident of the San Francisco Bay Area, I have learned that there are more than one within driving distance to me.

In an effort to make Sully Baseball more inclusive, I am promising to write at least one post about every team in the major leagues before the year is done.

I don't just want the bickering Red Sox and Yankee fans reading this blog.
I also want the die hard Devil Rays fans... both of them

Considering Canseco's Source

Remember when Canseco's book came out and everyone made fun of him? Said he was full of it and just trying to make a cheap buck by claiming McGwire, Giambi, Palmeiro and others were all 'roided up.

Then remember when all those players were hauled into Congress (because clearly there was nothing better for them to be looking into) and they all scoffed at Canseco's allegations by saying "consider the source"? (except Sammy Sosa who miraculously forgot how to speak English).



That source is looking a lot better these days, isn't it? Canseco is truly becoming the Herb Stemple of the steroid scandal.
A lot of things stink about the 'roid era. The fun being taken out of the pursuit of the home run title and watching Bud Selig show why he has always been a disingenuous stooge both stink.

So does looking at the stats of the era and speculating who was on it or not. (Hmmm, Kevin Millar's numbers certainly spiked and then fell off fast when testing came in. Hmmm, Luis Gonzalez sure became a big home run hitter in a hurry!)

But one this is beyond speculating: If you played with Canseco, you had a good chance of being an MVP.

Almost everywhere he went, power numbers would spike and one of his team mates would make a run at the MVP. His teammates Mark McGwire (1986-1992, 1997) and Jason Giambi (1997) are well documented. McGwire of course won't talk about the past and Giambi is sorry... just can't say why.


And his buddy from Miami Rafael Palmeiro waved that finger at congress. Now that we know he was doing something, take a look at the back of his baseball card.



He went from being a line drive doubles hitter to being one of the top home run hitters in the AL starting in 1993... Canseco's first full season as his teammate in Texas.

He was also teammates with future 2 time MVP Juan Gonzalez, another huge (literally) slugger who brokedown rather quickly.

Another teammate? Future MVP Pudge Rodriguez. (Anyone notice how skinny he got after testing started?)

Also he played with two pitchers, Kevin Brown and Kenny Rogers, who kept pitching into their 40s and had anger issues. ('Roid rage?)

On to Boston, and suddenly one of my all time favorite Red Sox hitters, Mo Vaughn saw his home run totals jump up by 10 to 15 a year and HE became an MVP. And suddenly broke down.

And it wasn't just the sluggers. Canseco and Clemens were teammates, don't forget. And Clemens was slowing down and was declared by Duquette to be done. And Roger, one of the most competitive people on the planet Earth, suddenly found his fastball again and rattled off 4 more Cy Young Awards. Ever notice how much bigger he got after leaving the Sox?


Back to Oakland in 1997 where future MVPs Giambi and Tejada shared a locker room with him.

Over to Toronto in 1998 where coincidentally Carlos DelGado and Shawn Green saw their home run numbers soar.

In 1999 he was in Tampa when Fred McGriff had his highest home run total in 5 years and Gerald Williams had his only 20 home run season

He also played with the real guy that Dennis Quaid was playing in The Rookie.
I think it is safe to say he was safe from suspicion.

Over to the Yankees in 2000 almost at the same time as Glenallen Hill... who went on the biggest home run tear of his career.

Finally he wrapped up with the White Sox where Paul Konerko, Ray Durham and Jose Valentin all set their career highs for home runs.

So either Jose Canseco was a fantastic good luck charm for a lot of players or considering him as a source might not be that dumb a thing to do.

I'm not saying all of those players were juiced... but one of the sad things about the 'roids era is you can't honestly be certain that they WEREN'T.

And it also shows the people who want to blame Barry Bonds for the steroid era the way Dustin Hoffman blamed the monkey in Outbreak for the virus are being too narrow minded.

We'll never know the number of pitchers nor sluggers who used them.
And it stinks that we will treat players guilty even without a test.
I am only certain of 2 things:

1. Canseco is turning into a pretty GOOD source on this subject

and
2. Dennis Quaid should have received an Oscar nomination for The Rookie.

TODAY'S PHOTOS

Medicine. Technology. Dogs. A dizzying and ever changing relationship, far too complex to be mapped out. Yet it has been.


This dog lamp causes the glue on the stuffed dog to dry.


Do you understand the symbiosis between canines, riverbanks, asian attire, white couples, and black magic? Study this diagram carefully and after you have given it some thought, come back to this question. If you are unable to answer it at that time, you will be shot.


"Meowch!" (Reaction to cat acupuncture written from authentic POV of a cat.)


Holistic Pet Euthanasia Center (chokehold demo).


Hello. I am Professor Truth. I can turn stuff into gold and do mind-readings. If you fuck my wife I will laser your face off with my claws. I am unflinching and all-knowing. I have never barked.

Oh yeah... the Red Sox. I almost forgot about them

The subjects of my blog show what a shallow and petty group we Red Sox fans are.

I put up post after post ripping the Yankees, analyzing the Yankees, gloating when they do badly, reveling in their soap opera and praising their theatricality.

And I barely write ANYTHING about the Red Sox, the team I love.

It's more fun to hate than it is to love sometimes.

What can I say? I wanted the Red Sox to sign Clemens mainly because it would hurt the Yankees! (What kind of values am I going to teach my children?)

But even without him, I love the pitching staff.
Schilling is pitching well (although it would have been interesting watching Clemens and Schilling try to share the spotlight.)

Beckett has adjusted and is throwing like an ace.
Dice-K has been up and down, but at least the Sox have been winning his starts.
Wakes looks good and even Tavarez (Julian, not the disco group) has thrown well his last two starts.

And with Papelbon, Okajima, Donnelly and Romero all doing well, they finally have a deep pen. When was the last time the Sox had a deep pen? Oh yeah... 2004.

And the lineup is good and role players like Willy Mo and Cora have gotten big hits.

They are the best team in the AL right now.
They've beaten the Yankees 5 out of 6 times.
They have a 6 game lead in the division, the biggest any team has.

And Manny is warming up.
Christ, even J.D. Drew isn't hurt yet.

Right now I wouldn't make a single player move. It's all working.

I have nothing to complain about.
So far the young season is going better than planned and it makes me happy.

And who wants to read that?

But enjoy more about Tavares.

An internet pal sent me some pix, via MySpace!!!

Remember Andrea? We like smiling together for photographs.


Sausage party.


Oh this was just this monsterrrrrrAHHHHHHHHH AAAAAAAAHHHHHH help HELP ME OH FUCK OWWWWW OWWWW

[unable to complete post]

I know that's illogical because the photograph wasn't captured at the exact same time as I was writing and I wouldn't have been able to write "unable to complete post" even if it had, so save the piles and piles of hate mail. My assistants have so many high priority tasks on their plates right now it doesn't make sense to bother them with this type of shit.

Can Clemens pitch the ninth?

Yeah the Yankees got back Clemens...
They can resign Pettite, Clemens, trade for Johan Santana and clone Christy Matthewson and it won't help them get into the playoffs as long as Mariano Rivera keeps soiling the bed.

Another day, another meltdown. He has as many losses as he has saves and his ERA is at 8.44.

But don't worry Yankee fans... it's only April.
Oh wait.

Clemens... it's going to get interesting

First of all, let me just say this:

The way the Yankees introduced Clemens was awesome.
Seriously, I want more teams to do this.

They have resigned one of the great marquee players of the last 20 years and instead of announcing it via a press release and one of those embarrassingly awkward press conferences where they put the uniform over a suit... they did it with showmanship.

They waited for a packed house and the 7th inning stretch to have Roger to pull his "Howdy Parter" routine to the cheers of the fans. It was so cool that Mike Mussina almost smiled.

Suzyn (sic) Waldman screamed in the press box "Roger Clemens is a Yankee!" in a way that made Al Michael's "Do You Believe In Miracles!" seem subdued.

I WANT MORE PLAYER MOVES LIKE THAT!
Next time the Red Sox make a big move, I want them to be parachuted into Fenway Park. Or maybe be hiding in the Wally Costume.

SOME THOUGHTS:

- GM Brian Cashman vowed to make the Yankees younger and less expensive.
That vow lasted a month.

But they had to do it. They needed a pitcher they can rely on and while he costs the Yankees an obscene amount of money, how is it more obscene than Carl Pavano making $8 mil a year and so far averaging a game a season?

And they don't need to worry he will implode in New York a la Randy Johnson and it won't cost them any prospects.

Plus as I mentioned in my "second act Yankees" post, the Yankees LOVE bringing back players who have won before (of course forgetting that they are older as well.)

- The Yankees get a savior every year, one whose acquisition is supposed to be the one that automatically clinches the World Series and makes it un fair for baseball... until said savior is watching from the dugout as another team celebrates. (see also Mussina, Giambi, Matsui, A-Rod, Brown, Vasquez, Sheffield, Big Unit and Damon)

Usually they make this move in December. This year they waited for May


- I love that some people are poo pooing the deal saying "He's just a 6 inning pitcher now."

Have you seen the Yankees pitching staff this year? Half the time Torre has been PRAYING for a 6 inning pitcher. They went through April where the starters were averaging less than FIVE innings. The Yankees have played 29 games and somehow they've already used 30 starting pitchers. You can look it up!

Plus having Roger gives the team a psychological boost. At least the teammates can recognize who he is! Look at tonight. The Yanks are starting someone named Matt DeSalvo. Ever heard of him? Me neither. Yahoo Sports doesn't even have a picture of him, unless his face is a Yankees logo.

Clemens will take Kei Igawa's spot in the rotation. Igawa's recipe for success is NOT knowing he is going to pitch on a certain day... but in order to do that, the Yankees have to keep breaking the legs of their young starters and throwing Igawa into games.

An overpaid guy who is clearly not wired correctly to play in New York?
Kei Igawa is Japanese for Carl Pavano.

- Jeter and Giambi evidently were constantly e mailing Clemens. I wonder if they use emoticons or say LOL. I have a friend who is a man's man, former captain of the football team, hunter, NRA member, life long Republican. He writes me e mails and occasionally signs off on an e mail with a little ":-)"

So it is possible Jeter could have written an e mail that would say "Gr8 if U came Back. ;-)" Or Giambi could have said "Karsten is as good as you. LOL"

- Us Red Sox fans will try to brush this move aside, but it is huge. Clemens has a tendency to make the pitchers around him a little better through his... a hem... big work outs.

And his presence will probably loosen up an undoubtedly tense Yankee clubhouse.
Plus Wang, Clemens, Pettite and Mussina is a darn good starting 4, especially if you remember their main job is to keep the opposition from scoring more than 5 runs.

And Torre will probably relax and stop pitching like his job is on the line.

And remember, this is not a move that was made for the long term benefit of the Yankees. This is a response to the "Sky is Falling" Yankee fans who were bracing themselves for their first irrelevant summer since 1992!

Scared we can't pitch? After losing a game 15-11, I'd be scared too! HAVE NO FEAR! CLEMENS IS HERE! And he rides in on his white horse, saving Joe's job... saving the summer... bringing the Yankees back to the promise land... and filling up the joint every 5th night.

And while EVERYTHING is going the Red Sox way and NOTHING has gone the Yankees way... 5 1/2 games is nothing to make up. I picked the Yankees to win the division before Clemens and they just might pull it off.

- And also let's stop with the whole "Roger is greedy" angle.
OF COURSE he's greedy! Everyone is a little greedy. And if I were in a position to milk out $19 million for 3/4 of a season, I'd do it too and so would you.



- HOWEVER let's not start booking the parade just yet.

With Roger pitching 6 innings a start, that means the usual suspects of Vizcaino, Bruney, Myers, Bean and Proctor are still pitching almost every day. Roger may like the run support he'll get in the Bronx but I am guessing he won't be thrilled to see the middle relief cough up leads.

Roger isn't pitching for the Yankees until June. (Coincidentally for a Red Sox series... chances are it won't get much publicity.) That means the Yankees will play another month with a pitching staff that has more holes in it than the plot to Spider Man 3.

And they are already 5 games back in the loss column. If the Red Sox could add a few more games to the lead, with their pitching staff the built the way it is... would it be too big a lead?

- Finally the Yankees have pushed all their chips into the middle of the table. They tried Younger and Cheaper, they tried We've got our own Japanese guy, they tried This Hughes kid might be the next Clemens. All that resulted was panic, finger pointing, some trainer got fired and somehow A-Rod became the most love Yankee since DiMaggio.

They had only one card left to play and that was Clemens saving the season.
And Clemens said what every Yankee thinks but virtually none will admit... Not winning a World Series is a failure in Yankee-ville.

Pressure is on.
Red Sox vs. Yankees just got a little better.

It's going to get interesting